Uncle Mike

So I’m an uncle. Yay! This morning my brother Steve’s wife Katee gave birth to a baby boy called David Robert Baptiste. Not to be confused with my other brother, David Jonathan Baptiste – though he has already announced on Facebook that he has been “replaced”.

David (the new one) has a full head of hair and is very cute. He’s also immaculately well behaved at present, not even batting an eyelid at the chaos around him as many people packed into the hospital room to see him. Hopefully he won’t be giving his proud parents too many sleepless nights in the future. Famous last words.

Uncle duties are many, of course. No doubt there will be the requisite toys at birthdays and Christmas (my wife Jo and I have already bought him a cool teddy bear that will sing him to sleep), but he will also have to be tutored in the way of the Xbox. Having heard about the antics of former One A Day mastermind Chris Schilling’s son, who is already a dab hand at Super Mario Galaxy despite having only just starting primary school, it’s clear that they can be trained from a very young age at every man-child’s favourite pastime. I predict that David will be walloping his father at FIFA by the age of eight, so let’s hope that Steve doesn’t turn into “Competitive Dad” from The Fast Show. As for me, I’ll be doing the good uncle thing and letting him win.

Congrats to Steve and Katee! I’m very happy indeed for them, and look forward to seeing Baby David again soon.

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