An occasional series about things that I hate for no logical reason whatsoever, and attempted justification thereon.
In this week’s thrilling installment:
Let the record state that I think Dara Ó Briain is a very funny man. His jokes are good, he’s quick-witted, and he makes a more than genial host of Mock The Week. But there’s one thing that really irritates the living shit out of me about him, something that when I reveal it may well ruin your own viewing of the above BBC2 programme and countless editions of Live At The Apollo (13, if it happens to feature Alan Carr).
At least a third of Dara’s gags are immediately followed by this sound: “Ehhhhhh.”
Yes, sounding much like the buzzer in a cheap game show, Ó Briain has this verbal tick upon delivering a joke, that I’m now looking for every time he speaks. It’s become my own unavoidable compulsion, like the way the poor unfortunate idiot in the horror movie decides to go looking for the source of the scary noise in that rather dark place where most of his friends have already died. “I’ll go down there without a torch. I’m sure I’ll be fine.”
I simply can’t stop listening out for it, and when it comes, I react as if I’ve just seen Ronan Keating. I shudder, teeth on edge, silently thinking, “Gaaaaah, noooo, make it stop, pleeeeease!” And then when the next gag comes, my ears involuntarily prick up, seemingly eager to find the sound once again (the Keating analogy well and truly ended before this particular sentence started, by the way).
It must be some sort of OCD on my part, but I’m stuck with it, just as Dara’s stuck with his “Ehhhhhh”. Whenever anyone mentions endlessly repeated examples of “y’know” or “at the end of the day” as being teeth-janglers, I agree, but for me – and maybe me alone – Ó Briain’s the chief.
Come to think of it, it’s probably the real reason Frankie left.
EDIT: Thanks to the “Mock the Week” team for solving the debate about how to spell Dara’s name. Much obliged.